Let’s be honest, speaking up for yourself in the workplace isn’t always easy. Whether it’s sharing an idea in a meeting, setting a boundary with your manager, overthinking a decision, or advocating for the promotion you’ve earned, self-advocacy can feel uncomfortable, even risky.

And I say that from experience.

There was a time in my career when I regularly held back. I had ideas, feedback, and concerns but I didn’t always voice them. I worried about being labeled “difficult,” or taking up too much space. I thought if I just kept working hard, someone would notice and advocate for me.

But that’s not how growth happens.

I had to learn, sometimes the hard way, that your voice is part of your value. If you’re not speaking up, you might be holding your career back.

Why Speaking Up Is a Leadership Skill

Self-advocacy isn’t just about asking for what you want. It’s about communicating your value, asserting your boundaries, and taking ownership of your professional path. When done well, it helps build trust, clarify expectations, and signal leadership readiness.

In today’s evolving work culture where hybrid schedules, burnout, and shifting priorities are the norm, your voice matters more than ever.

The Research: Why It’s Hard to Speak Up

Social psychologist Adam Galinsky has studied this exact dilemma, why people stay silent, and how to change it. In his TED Talk, “How to Speak Up for Yourself,” Galinsky explains the concept of a “range of acceptable behavior.” Every workplace and relationship has an invisible range of what’s seen as assertive vs. aggressive, confident vs. arrogant.

Depending on your individual intersections of role, identity, or experience, that range is often narrower. So speaking up feels like walking a tightrope.

But here’s the good news: that range can be expanded.

How to Expand Your Range and Speak Up More Often

Galinsky offers a few powerful strategies to help you speak up more effectively and safely:

• Advocate for others first. When you support someone else’s idea or contribution, people are more likely to see you as generous and trustworthy, widening your own range to speak up next.
• Use “we” language. When starting to self-advocate, instead of “I need,” try “we could benefit from…” This positions your voice as being in service to the team or mission when appropriate.
• Signal expertise early. Before you advocate for yourself, establish credibility. This helps people view your assertiveness as informed, not self-serving.

Start Small & Build the Skill

You don’t need to start by challenging your CEO in an all-hands meeting. In fact, specifically don’t do this. Try this instead:

• Speak up in a one-on-one conversation.
• Practice saying “no” or “not yet” when a request crosses a boundary.
• Share one idea in your next team meeting or conference, even if your voice shakes.

I had to start small too. Over time, self-advocacy became less about proving myself and more about honoring myself. And when that shift happened, everything else started to change, my confidence, my clarity, and the opportunities that came my way.

Self-Advocacy Is Self-Leadership

When you speak up, you’re not just advocating for a raise or a new project. You’re modeling leadership for yourself and for those around you. You’re saying: My ideas matter. My needs matter. I belong here.

And the impact? More confidence, more visibility, more alignment and more possibilities.

But it goes deeper than just your own growth.

When you advocate for yourself, you expand the range of what’s seen as acceptable behavior in your workplace. You make it safer for others, especially those who’ve historically been told to stay quiet or shrink, to speak up too. That’s how norms shift.

Your voice doesn’t just change your career. It changes the environment for everyone in it.

You Deserve to Be Heard

If you’ve been staying quiet out of fear, perfectionism, or not wanting to “rock the boat,” this is your invitation to try something different.

Start small.
Start scared.
But start.

Because your voice is not a liability, it’s an essential leadership asset. Here is a template to help track your wins and help build your confidence.

If this resonated with you, this is exactly the work I do with leaders. The [Leadership Reset Intensive] is a focused 90-minute 1:1 coaching session for leaders who need clarity and support right now. No long-term commitment. Learn more about [Leadership Coaching] or [Workshops & Team Development], email me at carmen@carmen-bolivar.com.

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